What She Gave Up by Jake Wickenhofer
He takes his pencil and sketches a few rough lines on the paper. The swift motion of his hand makes black streaks across the white. He brushes the hair from his eyes and bites his lower lip. From over his shoulder, I watch this master at work. My brother is an artist. With a pencil and paper, he can portray the most beautiful of God’s creation. Sometimes I will come home from school to find him painting a landscape of beautiful mountains underneath a purple sky. On other nights, I will find a canvas with his composition of a powerful hurricane passing over the innocent mother earth.
Today, the etchings on his paper begin to come together in the shape of a face. The gentle curve of a cheek becomes obvious. He carefully draws small ears and a nose. Then the figure is given an outline of long hair that flows over thin-framed shoulders. With a meticulous hand, he creates a thin midsection that expands at the hips. Two long legs end with tiny feet. Each toe is drawn to perfection. The portrait is faultless. I watch her with steady eyes; just as the angels must have watched over God’s shoulder as he began his work on man and woman.
“Who is she?” I ask as I hold the corner of the paper between two of my fingers. My brother doesn’t answer; he simply smiles and puts his pencil against the paper once more. Her mouth is drawn closed with two petite lips. As his work continues, I feel as though I am watching her birth occur in slow motion.
Her eyes take the longest. He spends a full hour completing them. Whenever I look into them, it is as though I can see every second of her life leading up to the moment in which my brother captured her. He must have seen her somewhere, I think to myself.
His wife may have left him, but he remained the gifted artist he was before.
She doesn’t know what she gave up.
Jake Wickenhofer is a seventeen-year-old writer living in Bridgeport, West Virginia.. His work has been accepted by magazines such as The Oracular Tree, Alienskin Magazine, Static Movement, AntipodeanSF, Flash Scribe, and of course Backhand Stories. His major influences are Greg Wickenhofer, Chuck Palahniuk, and Julie Maxey.
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The story is great! Its very interesting. Keep writing. Your awsome:)
Very…interesting…WE’RE GOING TO TAKE OVER THE WORLD with the amazing literature contained herein :]
Great job Jake! Love this story like I always do. Keep up the good work!
I…once gave up writing because I thought I wasn’t good enough, I don’t know why I’m choosing to say that but…just keep writing! Don’t ever stop, you’re really, really good!
This was excellent. I only wish it was longer – I was just getting into the story when it ended!
i’m impressed, its a sweet story, with the affection the brothers clearly share, its as if the 1 brother watches over his brother like a gaurdian watches over his charge. The artist seems, young, childish, but then he seems to know more aboout life, and love, with his wife gone, and the pictures he draws. What an inturesting character, i would like to know more about him and his brother. They’re dynamic, and i have a feel of reclusiveness, a smooth mood, that makes me want to read more into it. I hope you decide to write about these brothers again.
Great story. The way you the describe the evolution and coming to life of a piece of art from the initial sketches to the ‘birth’ of a living person is wonderful. Keep writing!
Amazing! I wish it were longer though, keep writing. I’d love to read more.
read my fictions?
Your critique is appreciated.
http://authspot.com/novels/blood-runs-forever-chapters-one-and-two/